Of Spiders and Flies

The Spider's Defense

Do not malign the spider,
That famed terrestrial beast,
And by no means despise her;
Begrudge her not her feast.

Call not her ways barbaric;
Say not that she is bad.
Her marriage esoteric,
Is not, for her, so sad.

Since she has legs aplenty
And eyes of jet galore,
Your snarking smacks of envy,
Of feeling oneself poor.

You whine about mosquitoes;
You grouse about the flies.
She makes them her burritos;
She shrouds them in silk ties.

So celebrate the spider!
Her castle's in the air
And misty iron glides her
From corners of the stair.


The Flies' Replies

We hear you praise the spider
As if she were a saint,
Society's defender.
We tell you now, she ain't.

Quite selfishly she eats us
And leaves the earth bereft
And recklessly depletes us--
It's practically theft.

We are, you see, most helpful,
(You mustn't heed her lies)
Expunging things unhealthful,
We stuff on stuff in sties.

The junk of Smith and Stankus
Throughout the earth replete,
You really ought to thank us
For tasting with our feet.

So flaunt before the spider,
Your love for all the flies.
Against recluse and widder,
Let war and raze arise!