Monday, August 26, 2013

Revelations

Burning arms drop,
aching, trembling,
uncertain now
with nothing
to strain to uphold.
The face doesn't know
what to do
without its smile.
Lips and cheeks
quiver, disarmed,
bare without
that afterimage
in the beholder's eye.

We learn ways
to earn favor,
ways to get through.
Weakness or strength,
when played right,
carve a case
for the soul.
It's something different,
this disintegration,
this falling down
of everything
and waiting
to be rebuilt--
like the nakedness
of birth or death:
"Lord,
have mercy on me,
a sinner."

4 comments:

  1. I like this poem immensely, and the poems you have blogged since blogging this one! I believe that it takes courage to write in short lines because any unnecessary words are instantly detectable -- but you needn't worry, this poem is very strong!

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    Replies
    1. Thanks, Thomas! I actually hadn't thought about that aspect of short lines. My cousin and I were considering how to choose line brakes the other day, and it seems that both of us kind of feel our way forward. In some ways, I wish for a more tangible theory about their placement. When you write a free verse poem, how do you decide where to end each line?

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    2. Sometimes I'll have an informal rule, such as beginning (or ending) every line with a stressed syllable. Sometimes I'll just make them typographically even, to the best of my ability. And sometimes I'll slip a pentameter into an otherwise "free" poem! But yes, line-breaks in a free verse poem can be tricky. I've been leaning on meter a lot lately, so the problem doesn't come up as often as it used to!

      One can end (or begin) a line with a word or idea that one wishes to emphasize; one can use anaphora, repetition, etc. All sorts of things!

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    3. Ah! Thanks for the hints! I'll have give them a try.

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